Übermeters v/s No meters

An old colleague, and new acquaintance, Iqbal (of Blaiq fame) suggested I put in place some parameters for comparing names. The belief is that these parameters will remove, or reduce, the element of subjectivity from the conclusions I arrive at in the name wars I construct and deconstruct. Well, here goes. (And here come the parameters.)

But before I go on, let me say this: nothing in this world is objective. Even quantifiable parameters will be subjective. Objectivity is an illusion. And yet, what parameters will do is reduce the feeling of subjectivity that anything without numbers comes attached with. That's the power, and the limitation, of numbers; they foster an impression that isn't necessarily true.

Speaking now of my parameters, they're not parameters. They're what I'd like to brand as 'Übermeters'. Why Übermeters? Because, like all good brands, these parameters must convey what is unique about them, which in this case, is a method I have come up with to compare brand names - a methodology I will proceed to expose you to, in part, in the paragraphs to follow.

In my experience some of the things that make a name memorable are how well it rolls of the tongue, how easy it is to read and spell and the kind of associations it makes people call upon. It's a proven fact that words with alternating vowel and consonant sounds are easier to pronounce and remember...on second thoughts, this is hard to do.

The way my mind works is not worth quantifying. Besides, I don't do this for a living. If someone were to come to me with a naming problem and was willing to pay me to solve it, I'll put down a complete list of Übermeters in a well-written and properly pdf'ed white paper with quantifyable reasons for recommending some names more than others.

Then again, what I will do for the benefit of Mr. Kite and other people who do take the trouble to kindly, patiently and not-so-religiously read this blog (for the fun of it) is put down the three basic Übermeters I evaluate names on and, then, tag a descriptive paragraph (or three) alongwith each name-war I set up in the posts to come.

The three Übermeters I'll expose to my audience to are the 'stop-start factor', the 'long and the short cut' and the 'story meme'. Each of these Übermeters will be on a scale of 1 to 10. As we go down the road of this naming trip, we'll see how well (or not) they work. Anyone who wishes to contribute to this metering scale is welcome to do so.

Caveat: Like everything else good and evolutionary, this is a work in progress. So help me dear non-creationist God.